JR & TWA; Houston, Texas

PROLOGUE Along the streets of Philadelphia, a motorcycle zooms along the highway speeding. The motorcyclist then reached its destination of the studio where The White Angels practice. He got off the bike & entered the studio, still wearing his helmet. "Where have you been Eric?" asked Frank, "We got to rehearse for our Houston concert. And take off the helmet!" "Band, get a load of what's under the helmet!" said Eric. Eric went over to the tympanis (with helmet still on) & played a long hard drum roll! Frank went over & took off his helmet! The band was shocked & thrilled. "Yes, you're looking @ the new Eric Hunter!" he said as he stopped drumming, "Check it out! I got a shorter haircut with spiky curly hair, a moustache & a goatee beard! And I pumped me up a few muscles!" Eric took off his shirt & started showing off his new muscles like a bodybuilder. "You look great!" said Victoria, "Did you get the idea from Will Friedle in his H E Double Hockey Sticks role?" Eric nodded, then went to his drums & played a swishy beat on the snare drum with brushes. "Play H E Double Hockey Sticks, Joe!" said Eric playing. So Joe humored Eric by messing on his electric guitar playing a fast solo, rhythm riff. October 2 (my birthday) I was watching local talk show, Debbie Hines while having breakfast. Her guests included Phoebe & Matt Roman along with The White Angels. Phoebe & Matt got to sing (with Matt playing guitar), then got interviewed. Matt mentioned he wants to quit being a rock star & be a music producer, that made me cry like Lucy! "WAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" "Quit your Lucy crying Larry!" snapped Debbie to the camera. The White Angels were interviewed next. There was little space for their instruments, so they showed a music video instead. DEBBIE: Eric, you look like a hottie! ERIC: Thanks, this will get the band popular & the babes drooling! DEBBIE: Your concert was scheduled for August, but Hurricane Beverly had other plans. FRANK: Our manager, Ray Walters, got a telegram from Pacific Records on our Dallas stop. Sorry to hear Beverly hit your city. DEBBIE: All the band members are now married, but your music keeps you popular. How did you meet? JOE: Frank lived in Philly after doing a cruise ship gig & discovered all his band members one by one in Philly. FRED: I came from San Antonio & heard about my cousin's success as a vibist. So I packed my marimba & motorcycle, headed to Philly & won Frank's ear. VICTORIA: I played trumpet since high school. I played in a beach pageant. Even though I lost, I won a spot in the band & a husband (kissing Frank). DEBBIE: My favorite tune's Tropical Breezes. Who wrote it? BEN: Fred & I. It's the only song that features us playing the vibes & marimba. We each solo on our instruments, I play marimba with Fred, switch instruments & Fred plays the vibes with me. On other songs, we write our own arrangements & cool soloes. DEBBIE: I also heard Ralph's leaving. RALPH: This is my last concert. I'm moving to Anaheim to be a stadium organist for the Mighty Ducks. DEBBIE: I think Bart looks hot on this pic of Black Jazz Magazine. How often do you play the guitar? BART: A few songs. But Joe lets me play a guitar solo, I also sing one song. DEBBIE: That's great. The White Angels @ Compact Central along with Matt & Phoebe Roman, 7:00 tonight! I was excited! Couldn't wait to see them again like I did @ Dallas. That afternoon, I caught the 25 Northline going to Compact Central to see the concert. Unfortunately, a car cut in front of the bus to make a pit stop @ Burger Queen causing the bus to come to a screeching halt! I hit my head very hard & was unconscious laying on the floor of the bus. The next thing that happened, I woke up & found myself in a hospital bedroom. So I grabbed the button & called the nurse saying, "Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard!" Along with a nurse, three doctors rushed into the room. I asked what happened & that the last thing I remembered was going to the concert on the bus until it crashed. "You're OK." said Dr. Fine, "You almost had a Rip Van Winkle nap. You've slept for 15 years!" "15 years?!" I cried, "I gotta get out of here!" "But we still have to examine you." said Dr. Howard. "No way!" I said as I escaped! They chased me all around the hospital & luckily, I ditched inside a janitor's room with an outfit. So I wore the outfit & walked normally out of the hospital. I found out that the city now has a light rail system. So I went to the one place I would get answers, the library. Even that changed, they had a video internet service that accessed any information for $5 an hour. Once I found an open booth, I placed some headphones on, typed in The White Angels & found a great website. The video started with highlights of their concerts. Then the main menu came up & I accessed "Where Are They Now?" & up came a menu of all the current & future band members. I didn't bother clicking the future members. So I clicked on Joe. The video showed Joe Roman headlining a Las Vegas hotel. Joe grew a full beard & was singing with the band holding a mike in his hand. Sometimes, Joe would grab his electric guitar to play with the band & sing on some songs. Joe was still a super guitarist. Next I clicked Frank & he was the manager of The Scott Roman Band. His son, Michael sang & played trumpet while Scott played guitar & sang. Then I clicked Ben. Ben's now a high school jazz band director & not only did he conduct, he also played the vibes. He even had a student that also played vibes that they would play a vibes duet. Next I clicked Fred. Fred & his family returned to San Antonio where he worked in a 9-5 job downtown. Occasionally, Fred would play the marimba in a mariachi band. Next I clicked Jason. Jason worked as a music producer of Pacific Records helping out new talent. Jason would sometimes sit in on bass. Next I clicked Bart. Bart's the only other White Angel who had a solo career. Bart gave up the sax & only played the guitar. Sometimes Bart would sing, but girls liked his body. Next I clicked Ralph. Ralph worked @ a piano-organ store by day & by night, he still played organ for The Mighty Ducks hockey games. Next I clicked Victoria. Victoria gave up her trumpet to be a music lawyer. She helped her son Michael, get gigs for his band. Then I was afraid to click on Eric, but I did. Eric Hunter's an actor/bodybuilder/musician. Eric's 1st movie had him play a musclebound surfer dude wearing Guts whether he surfed, attracted babes with his killer body or playing the drums/tympani. He later did a series of movies being a motorcycle super agent. His son, Derek, would be a teen bodybuilder who also played drums & tympani. When I left the library, across the street there was a concert performed by The Scott Roman Band. Like father, like son, Scott had a hottie build, a strong singing voice & a super guitarist, playing his Dad's Washborn. After soloing, Scott let Michael play a trumpet solo followed by DC's vibes solo. I was enjoying the next generation of White Angels until the police & doctors grabbed me & carried me away. "I wanna see The White Angels' kids!" I yelled, "There's nothing wrong with me, nothing! Leave me alone!" Then suddenly, I woke up @ Burger Queen murmuring, "White Angels." "Don't worry son." said a paramedic, "You're OK. Your not going to see any angels anytime soon." "What happened?" I asked. I learned that I was OK after all. The driver of the car was arrested & taken to traffic court. Then, a security guard on a motorcycle asked me if I wanted a lift to the concert. I didn't think it would be Joey Lawrence again after the Minnesota story. So I drove off with him. When arriving @ Compact Central, it turned out to be Ben Sanders. Hours before the concert, I got to watch them do sound check. It was pretty cool watching them again just like Dallas. Matt even did sound check playing his red guitar & singing. Afterwards, "I'm gonna miss being a rock star." said Matt. "You can't mean that?" I pleaded. "Grow up, Larry!" yelled Matt, "This is my last concert!" "Fine!" I yelled, "I don't need a backstage pass, I'll sit where peasants belong, in the balcony!" So I handed my pass back & walked away from the stage. Went to drown my sorrows with an orange snow cone bought @ a concession stand. Then I mounted up the stairs & went to find a seat in the balcony. I founded a booth & there were two old ladies playing gin rummy. "May I sit with you?" I asked. "Do you play?" asked an old lady as I nodded. "Be our guest." said the other lady. So for an hour, we played gin rummy. "We're only passing the time away until the show comes on. Then we'll heckle it!" (Laughing) "Great, a female Statler & Waldorf!" I complained. "I'm Rodeway & she's Ramada." she said, "Your fanfic audience are probably skunks." "Your stories stink!" said Ramada, both laughing! Then Rodeway cried "Gin!". They beated me badly! At the Houston concert, Matt & Phoebe Dee were going @ it. Girls were screaming over Matt's music, especially when he & Joe did Motorcycle Brothers. "More like Tricycle Brothers." heckled Rodeway, both laughing. After the song, Matt said, "Now that the concert tour's over, I've decided to quit singing & playing music to be a full time producer. So this is the last song I'll ever sing." The girls & I all cried like Lucy! Matt played guitar & sang solo for the last time as we all cried over Matt's swan song. Then as Matt left the stage, Joe gave him an off-stage hug to comfort him. When The White Angels performed, Rodeway & Ramada went wild seeing Joe doing a guitar solo. But the girls screamed over Eric's new look when he played a tympani solo. During the middle of the concert, Ralph announced, "This is also my swan song. I'm leaving the band to be the stadium organist for The Mighty Ducks." Ralph got to play an organ solo & started singing his swan song. About two songs from the end of the concert, security guards escorted me off the balcony as Rodeway & Ramada didn't care. "There goes the pest!" quipped Ramada, "I bet they'll spray him with Raid!" (both laughing) I was escorted to the band's dressing room where Matt & Pheobe were waiting. Phoebe carried a big box & placed it on the table. The box had a #45 tag on it. "Happy birthday Larry." said Matt, "Open up the envelope." I was expecting a birthday card, but instead it read "$764". Matt got to his wallet & handed me $764 in cash. "Now you can either keep the money or give it back for the contents of this box. Could be something cool, could be a Klunk, could be $25,000! What do you want to do Larry?" asked Matt. "Great, a Treasure Hunt sketch!" I groaned, "I'm the wrong sex to play this game show." "You wrote it, just go along with it." said Matt. So I gave $764 back to Matt for the contents of the box. So Matt opened the box & out popped a cartoon dog. It was Brian, the talking dog from the Emmy winning cartoon series, Family Guy! "It's hot in that box," complained Brian, "Hope I'm getting paid for appearing in this fanfic or I'll sue." Then Brian grabbed two cupcakes & told me to come closer to the box. Then Brian sang, "Happy birthday to you, You belong in a zoo. You smell like a skunk, So you'll get a Klunk!" Brian took the cupcakes & splatted them on my face. Then he got a bag of cat food & handed that to me. The famous funky "KLUNK" music was heard as the announcer said, "That's right Larry, you got Klunked on your birthday! The value of Brian's fee along with the cupcakes & cat food..." music stops as he says in low voice "$59.45". "Hey!" complained Brian, "I'm worth more than that just like this RUBBER CHECK FOR $25,000!" Brian handed me the worthless check as the "KLUNK" music resumed & the announcer said, "Enjoy your worthless check, valued..." music stops, "Are you kidding? You'll go to jail!" Brian got out of the box as the Treasure Hunt commercial cue played & headed to find a tree. But he used the gentlemen's room instead. I was crying like Lucy because I got Klunked on my birthday! "You want more to cry about!" snapped Matt, "Let's go next door!" Matt grabbed me by the ear & threw me next door. And next door was the band that threw a surprise party for me along with Ralph's going away party. We has cake & ice cream. Five minutes later, Matt & Brian surprised me with a song as they sang (with Matt on guitar) a song sung to the tune of "I Love Lucy". MATT: Happy birthday, you'll have a ball. There's no pigeons in Larry J.'s hall. BRIAN: I don't have fleas or ticks. When I read one of his fanfics. MATT: He writes stories for Lawrence fans. And he ends up with dish pan hands. BRIAN: From Ingo, David & Lori... BOTH: Have a happy, Yes have a happy old birthday, Larry! The band applauded as I hugged Matt & Brian licked me on the face. Matt asked me to take a picture with him & Brian as a souviner. After taking the picture, Matt apologized for his behavior & said, "There's one more souviner I want you to have that was in the box. Actually, it's from the band as a birthday gift. Hope you like owning Ben Sanders' vibes!" The curtain opened as the vibes revealed. Then spightly music was heard as the announcer said, "Happy Birthday Larry! You've won Ben Stein's, I mean, Ben Sander's vibes! This musical instrument has 37 silver bars, a motor controller with fan speed & adjustable dampening, swivel pedal. Comes with two pairs of mallets, all made by Emerald Percussion! The retail value of this very cool sounding instrument..." music stops, "$2,495.00!" I hugged Matt, Brian, Joe, Ben & the rest of the band as the Treasure Hunt commercial cue really happened. As for the concert tour, Pacific Records made a total of $24,000,000! Each band member + Matt & Phoebe made $1,000,000 each. While my vibes were being loaded into a moving truck, I saw Brian wearing a suit & tie, a derby & sporting a beard. So I went along with the gag asking, "Will you verify the fact that you did hide that check for $25,000?" "No I didn't!" he said. Suddenly, a puff of smoke happened & who should appear, "I had the check all along! It's for ladies only, you twit!" You guessed it, from my game show webpage, The Game Show Witch! "I wanna appear in a fanfic so I can scare the crap out of you! I'll make sure Treasure Chest/We Hate Men! Hour returns to tv & wins another Daytime Emmy. Don't get in my way, just try! I'll get you my pretty & that stupid little talking dog too! (CACKLING)!" Then Brian started doing his business on her & she started screaming, "I'm melting! How could you do this to a stupid character?" I thanked Brian & told him he could be in my fanfics. "Only for a limited time, Larry." said Brian. It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship!